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sigh

Only a female presidential candidate would have this kind of thing written about them by the Washington Post. If this article were in, say, People, that would be different.

8:38 a.m. - Jul. 20, 2007

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everything changes

Today I got an e-mail that reminded me that I am not the only one with problems. I don't have many close friends here. When I was in CA, I had the problems and excitements of 5 or 6 friends in my mind always, as well as whoever I was dating and my family.

Now, I mainly think of my boyf and my family. Somehow my family seems to demand more emotional attention these days, maybe because of Mae*ve, and my parents aging, though they are thankfully still perfectly healthy.

Anyway, I found today that an old friend has been going through a life catastrophe, and I didn't even know about it. I've been in my usual daze, stressing about work, worrying this week that the doctor would call me and inform me I'd tested positive for some terrible disease, thinking about my other friend who just got married, and my own relationship. And bang, I get an e-mail.

There are too many people that I don't know what's going on in their life. Some people, I don't care. You realize which friendships are meaningful and which aren't after a while. Distance and time also allows reflection on what a friendship really means.

(On a side note, if everyone blogged diligently, things would be a lot easier.)

10:29 p.m. - Jul. 19, 2007

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i wonder

Plane crashes are so scary. They are also usually avoidable.

Of course, the disaster yesterday makes me think about Ma*eve's friend Marcie. I just cringe thinking of all the relatives. What a horrible, pointless disaster!

From CNN:

Sao Paulo's Congonhas airport is notorious for having short, slippery runways.

Runways at Congonhas were recently resurfaced, but the cutting of grooves to channel rainwater off the pavement had not been completed.

Just Monday, a small plane skidded off a runway at Congonhas airport, which is designed to best handle short commuter flights for Brazil's large domestic air market.

In February, a Brazilian court banned large jets at the busy airport because of safety concerns. But an appeals court overruled the ban, saying it would hurt business and that the safety problems did not warrant halting air traffic, according to AP.

I wonder if the person who allowed the runway to be used before the grooves had been cut was worried yesterday about landings in the rain. I wonder about the members of the appeals court, and the witnesses who gave the information that convinced them to reopen the runway.

8:31 a.m. - Jul. 18, 2007

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4700 feet

B snapped this picture of me on our way up Mt. Dick*erson. This was taken about 1000 feet short of the summit. I can't believe how much snow is still on the ground - we were only at about 4700 feet here.

7:49 a.m. - Jul. 16, 2007

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phsyical

Yesterday, I had no less than appointments, one dentist and the other for a phsyical, part of my New Year's desire to be a healthy person.

The physical was something else. I'm glad I didn't know what it entailed in advance, or I would have dreaded it probably for some time. The first shock was a pap sme*ar. Gross. Invasive. My first. Enough said. Next was vials of blood taken. I *hate* giving blood, even a little bit. I've fainted, cried, the works. Now that I'm an adult, I manage to avoid both, but I still detest it. Never mind the fact that the reason they want the blood was to test for all manner of horrible diseases. Who knows, they could be determining I have bubonic plague as I write. What a lovely thought. Then there was the ear-cleaning. If you've never had it done, it's not awful, just a little gross. I now know why I've avoided going to the doctor all these years.

I expected a phsyical more in line with the type they used to give in high school. Interestingly, there was very little overlap between the two.

5:27 p.m. - Jul. 12, 2007

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lowlights

It's hard to be back. My house is badly in need of TLC, and I had over 100 e-mails in my inbox on arrival at work this morning. I actually don't get that many e-mails compared to a lot of my co-workers, but the ones I do get often need to be dealt with.

Aus*tin, Texas had highlights and lowlights. Highlights included seeing M and her new husband dance together, and the way he looked at her when he saw her in the gown for the first time. I'm not really all that romantic, but I was really touched. J, the new husband, was very nice. The other major highlight was hanging out at the five pools at our resort. The others thought it was no big deal, but I was like - It's warm! And I get to go swimming! I was so excited. There was even a waterslide. It was like being in the Caribean or something.

Lowlights, or rather *the* lowlight included getting really, really sick, albeit for a very short time. We went out drinking Thurs*day night, and I had a few drinks, maybe three or four. Not enough, I thought, to make even lightweight me sick. At 2 AM, throwing up over the railing, I concluded I must have been wrong and reached a new low.

The next day, at 2 PM, I still couldn't keep even a little bit of water of water down. That's when I concluded that maybe one too many drinks was not the only culprit, and I also started getting a little nervous because I was starting to feel really bad - weak, and tingly and just not good. So, after heading to two doctors that wouldn't see me (due to my out-of-state insurance), we (JB and I) finally found one that would accept my insurance. I was dying or felt like it anyway. It made me realize that if I ever REALLY get sick, I am in big trouble. Mentally, I just am not happy when my body does things I can't explain.

They gave me a shot and voila, no more vomiting. I felt sick the rest of the trip though - until Sunday. Not fun. It was especially bad because I felt I'd made myself look like a really bad drunk. The bride was one of my best friends in college, and JB is a good bud, but everyone else I didn't know or was an acquaintance of at best. I also didn't really get to know her new husband as well as I would have liked.

3:35 p.m. - Jul. 09, 2007

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off again

I'm off again. I got back to my house this morning, and I'm getting on a flight at 4:00 to attend Maggie's wedding. It's been a while - she visited once while I was at Stanford, but we haven't seen each other since then.

It's nice to be away from work! I'm sure I'll be swamped next week, of course. Still, it reminds me that I'd like to retire young.

1:50 p.m. - Jul. 04, 2007